xclusively-moi

Nostalgia

2006-05-12T07:56:00.001-07:00

Thats moi and moi's baby cousin(1 of my many FAVS) whom had spent growing into her adolesence years in France. To me she's always a baby.... i can still remember the times when we we playing hide n seek at my house (my mum babysit her)... mornings as a toddler she would have her peanut butter treats....her squelings when me n my sis gang up to chase after her.... n now.....she's coming 16! can't believe how time flies by so FAST!...hhmmmm yeah that means i'm old now.....

Hmmmmm what's with me n nostalgia recently???!?!! haizz....i guess as of from today, i've only 37 days exactly to 18th June..... The day i make that BIG step in my life....yo don't drift into thinking me getting married! woahhh not yet man! NOT YET!!! Thats the day i'm flying all alone to a new life in NZ......who knows if God willing thats gonna be my home thereafter.......(n I'm not afraid)

Romeo of this life or my life (u may wonder if i'm destined to be in NZ)??? huh i shall NOT divulge into that...... I'd like to leave it in the trusty hands of fate or in short...God.

oh back to my nostalgic reminisizing self......... guess i won't stop ....as long as this dreamer breathes....

Ciao

2006-05-12T07:56:00.000-07:00

2006-05-08T21:41:00.000-07:00

Don’t you think words of love sounds all too lame? But the anticipation is actually wordless & the weight, you can actually feel it’s heaviness. Surreal…
(quote from Aiza)

Airport Karma???

2006-05-07T09:01:00.000-07:00

Went to the airport last evening to send off my uncle leaving for France. Its gonna be 2 years till I get to see him..(his return in August but by than I'd have bid my farewell to everyone & everything here..)

As he proceed to the glass doors to the immigration, I could envisioned myself walking that same path on 18th June 2006 carrying my bag and winter coat... My heart raced and my mind became blurry just imagining that step I would be making is the step to a new life, a new beginning and a whole brand new ME!

I can’t help but count down my days (as how I call it: My days are numbered) lets see…. Today 7th May till 18Th June……I’ve 6 weeks exactly and that makes it 42 days!!!! Gosh 42 days and I’m not quite a quarter ready....... The embarkation to New Zealand has given me mixed emotions…… Yes that’s my dream….. Yes I’m prepared but…… something…..some dangling issues swaying me from making my step…..Can I refer it as something or should I say its because of someone???//

I don’t know why….. but this has been in me and within me for years…..Man for a person that less practices patience, it puzzles me why and where I get the patience to sustain in keeping this in me for this long!! It puzzles my bestfriend too ESPECIALLY that I bother her now and then about it since we were 15 and now that we’re both over the adolescence stage (yet she IS EVER SO PATIENT to tolerate my nonsence)

Coming back to my karma story……..
So I vision myself…… on 18th June,7.55pm flight on either British Airways or Qantas at Changi Airport Terminal 1…….. walking thru the glass doors that separates the departure hall and immigration counter, carrying my bag, documents and coat...... with heavy heart to leave all else behind on this sunny Singapore to a new life in New Zealand… I proceed on every step with great determination and courage.

I know the terminal will be flooded by my mum’s tears (hmmmm as well as mine??? Heheheh) but deep down in me, I do hope and pray that the special one would just appear…… maybe even send me off all the way to NZ…. Hmmmmm DREAMSSSS…. Yeah dream on……. I’m a dreamer anyway……..

Recently for 2 nights within this week, I had dreamt of him!….thru these years, not once have I dreamt of him in my sleep ( of course my day dreaming don’t count here…) It felt real…. Surreal….My sense felt it real… the touch….the scent….IT WAS REAL……besides making my slumber beautiful, it made my day dreamy…… ahhhhhh…. And yes I float thru the next day or I can say days….LITERALLY F.L.O.A.T ! If this is meant to be, let it be…..heheheheheh

Truth is, I’m a chicken and coward when comes to confessions……well let the confession story be of another day’s essence…………..

Foolish Pride

2006-05-07T05:04:00.000-07:00

There's so much I can't say
When I look into your eyes,
I'm worried you'll reject me
And hurt my foolish pride.
Each day this love grows stronger,
But I could never let u know.....
There's so much behind my smile
That I could never show.
I'd hold you for a lifetime,(I have indeed been doing so)
If you would let me in,
I'd love you like no other
But you don't understand as you never get to know......
The pain is like a knife
Cutting deep into my soul
So I'll dream of us together,
Of just how it could be
And all that u r
Will remain a silent part of me.........

In a Manner of Speaking

2006-05-04T07:47:00.000-07:00

In a Manner of speaking
I just want to say
That I could never forget the way
You told me everything
By saying nothing

In a manner of speaking
I don't understand
How love in silence becomes reprimand
But the way that i feel about you
Is beyond words

Oh give me the words
Give me the words
That tell me nothing
Ohohohoh give me the words
Give me the words
That tell me everything

In a manner of speaking
Semantics won't do
In this life that we live we only make do
And the way that we feel
Might have to be sacrificed

So in a manner of speaking
I just want to say
That just like you
I should find a way
To tell you everything
By saying nothing.

Oh give me the words
Give me the words
That tell me nothing
Ohohohoh give me the words
Give me the words
That tell me everything

Oh give me the words
Give me the words
That tell me nothing
Ohohohoh give me the words
Give me the words
That tell me everything

A nook of life...

2006-03-12T04:05:00.000-08:00

.....Oh how i miss this life.....
...life i've forsaken for years not realised......

sitting by the corner of the water-feature wall.....
sipping latte....
.....nibbling on apple crumble...
..browsing thru magazines........
Quiet nook for thinking....for inspiration.
.....for touching base...

The very place spent with meaningful sharing,
dreams abound & woven...
carved & casted beautifully in minds alike...

Times of great joy or displeasure...
..this hideout always sort after...
A cradle of comfort...
a nook of smiles.....
..our shared hidden treasure.

I'm all dressed up....
..its all so perfect...
A perfect Saturday morning retreat
amidst the urban jungle....

But ................................
after all.......its an imperfect perfection.
.....a missing masterpiece accompanyment.....
....far.....far......far away......
....in Dubai.

written on 4/3/2006

Sunshine

2006-02-23T05:37:00.000-08:00

Sunshine

Sunshine you rose one day from the horizon casting
your rays on me lighting up every unlit corners.
All of a sudden my life was coloured.

Colours I’ve never notice existed.
Deserted, lonely, untouched nooks and crannies came to life
by your bright existence casting upon it all .
From that moment on,
every sunrise fills me with greater joy
more than the day before.

Joy so unknown, such a stranger, floods through my veins and my soul
waking me up from my long deep slumber…..
The chirping of the birds became music to my ears
casting down all gory fears…..

Sunshine you were there day or night, rain or shine forever sweet
and charming that quarter of a year…..

I HATE that tragic 20th thunderstorm swallowing up my precious sunshine…….

Now everything has gone cold, misty and grey……
I can’t see the colours anymore…… has it made me blind ?!
OH MY GOD!! I guess I AM !
I am blinded by the grief of losing my dearest sunshine…..

This grief is making me lose ALL my senses….
Day or night does not matter anymore….
All I need and pray for is your return to me my sunshine ….my joy….

wooo my 1st delivery

2006-02-23T04:54:00.000-08:00

Hooooo woooo!!

What an experience for my very 1st delivery!!! Can't believe i FINALLY did it (tech-no dinosaur) heheheh lets c what this dino can do-oo-oo